Crushed (and update on Mark)

 

I don’t want to believe it.  I told Mark last night that I was so very scared about his “procedure” today.  He told me not to worry about it ’cause he knew it was just the hole had gotten bigger and they’d fix it.  I told him I didn’t think so and my heart of heart’s told me it was worse than that.  He asked me what I thought it was.  I said blockage, open heart surgery.

I never in a million years dreamed that it would be even worse than that!!!!!

Mark has a very rare heart condition called pulmonary hypertension.  The doctor who worked on him today said that name means that the blood pressure of his heart is too high and they have no idea what causes it.  He is going to try his best to treat it here BUT the medicine is very expensive and there are only a handful of clinics in the country who deal with treating this condition.  If he can’t help Mark, he will be sent to one of these clinics in Chicago.

I can’t take this!!!!  I am crushed, overwhelmed, I don’t even have a word that is close enough to conveying how I feel.  Shock is putting it mildly.  I thought I was prepared.  I thought God had forewarned me that it was going to be bad, but this?????????????????

Why does it have to be something so RARE?????????????????  Can anyone reasonably expect to receive more than one miracle in their life, more than two miracles for a couple?  I’m afraid to believe that there will be another, what if there’s not?  I wouldn’t survive it.

Your prayers are needed more than ever before!

SPEECHLESS

Two Poor Sinners (and update on Mark)

Picture was found on pinterest.com

Well, I’m pretty sad today.  Mark went yesterday to have the ultrasound done on his heart and now has to go back on Friday for the angiogram.  They said his right side was too inflamed to see anything.  When they go in on Friday, if they can determine the cause and IF it’s minor enough, they will fix it right then and there but if not, we are probably looking at open heart surgery.

I feel like a broken record saying this but, please keep him in your prayers.

Love and hugs to all, Terri

Update and More Life Lessons Learned Wisdom

The world keeps turning
as faster it goes
bonfires burning
deliver their blows
the acid ‘s churning
as all heaven know    
and what I’m learning
while the stress grows
is all I’m earning
is an ulcer, suppose?

Teresa Marie  9/2/13  ©

Well, I said I would update you on everything, hopefully I remember it all:

Dad is all clear of cancer.  We are guessing that it just went too long before they realized that he needed surgery and has suffered permanent nerve damage in his spine 😦  The dementia is continuing to worsen.

Jodie’s son was buried on Wed.  Her grandson is doing pretty good now; granddaughter is doing much better and expected to recover, fully?  We will pray it’s so!  Children are strong, resilient little boogers.  Hoping for the best.

Mark is back to square one, we think, but are unsure.  One message said the tests he did were negative but he still needed to get the rest done.  The cardiologist told him last Friday that he didn’t, ?  He has an appt. with his regular doctor tomorrow, guess we’ll see what he says then.  He still can’t go back to work until they find the cause.  Burning through his vacation time rapidly and harvest will soon be upon us 😦

I need a break.  The stress finally took its toll and I slept for 2.5 days straight.  Only woke up to go to the bathroom and eat occasionally.  Hanging in there though 🙂  Thank you all for your comments, love and prayers!!  It means the world to us.

Love and blessings to you all, Terri

Now for some wisdom:

Mad Hatter Matter (and Update)

I thought that I might actually lose it today!  I’ve been barely hanging on with my last fingernail, then it broke!!

Mark took his sugar readings and they were as follows: 139 (scary but he didn’t fast as long as he was supposed to so we disregarded it), 89, 86 and 88.  Which, according to the papers they gave him, was a possible indication of hypoglycemia.  Then he went to the doctor this afternoon.  The nurse practitioner that he saw before was sick and so he got a different one.

She completely threw out the notion that it was his blood and went straight for another possibility.  Guess what she said?  His heart!  As she was getting some papers she had printed for him, in walks his doctor who is on vacation this week.  He came in specifically to talk to Mark and order a battery of heart tests.

I didn’t want to believe what I thought I had heard in my spirit intentionally when this all started but, as with every time I ignore those voices, I should have listened!!  I’m numb right now with the shock to my system.

For better news:

Dad’s biopsy came back negative, so no cancer.

Kevin said that their grandson was released from the hospital yesterday.  The granddaughter is doing well enough that they are putting that piece of her skill back on and she is no longer being kept sedated.  She is expected to recover with, hopefully, minimal or no permanent damage to her brain.  They are all staying at the Ronald McDonald house so they can be close to her.  Jodie’s son’s funeral was today.

Please pray for Mark some more!!!  I’m worried sick, in more ways than one but mostly because, what would I ever do without my soul mate here with me?  I can’t fathom it 😦

Love, hugs and blessings to you all, Terri

The Latest on Mark After His Doctor Visit

Well, I’m still hoping for the lesser of evils here.  The Nurse Practitioner said, with his family history, we are probably looking at “early onset diabetes”.  They sent him home with a One Step, I think that’s what it was called, to check his blood sugar this weekend and keep a diary of the readings.  (Don’t forget about the fact that Penny has it and so we will know what those mean when he takes them.)  He is to go back on Monday and they will go over it all.  He said to me, “Ya, well you know I don’t like needles and shots!”  My reply was, “I’d take your needle over mine any day of the week.  Your’s would be no more than a bee sting!!” I’ve been getting the larger diameter/shorter needles lately which are only 2 1/2 inches long instead of the 3 inch ones.  The MS drug is inter-muscular so the needle has to be long enough to go beyond the layers of skin and fat on my thigh. Hey wait a minute!  Now that I have lost 40 pounds, it seems that I should be rewarded with maybe a 2 inch needle, doesn’t it?  I wish

Anyway, there is nothing new to report on our other crisis for now, but no news is good news, right?!

Thanks again for your prayers, they are being heard!

With  my love, ,  Terri

 

P.S.  I definitely need to have something on the lighter side, so look for my next post following shortly 😉

P.S.S.  I almost forgot about the pics of my latest work in progress, almost finished, in the dragon saga   No story as been written for it yet, sorry.  This house has it all, even a bonsai tree in the back and a magic vine!

 

 

Dreams

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–  Okay guys, I’m gonna let you all in on what I’m working on.  I have a dream!  Since I started working with the clay last fall I noticed some things:  it helps my brain communicate better with my hands; it boosts my mood; helps my depth perception; makes my brain work in a straight line to follow directions on tutorials; strengthens my grip; keeps my hands from stiffening up, therefore reducing pain; and more.  Unfortunately, when I can’t afford to buy any clay, the effects start reversing.

So I began my quest with trying to find a clay supplier who would offer a good discount to artists with disabilities.  While I was waiting for their replies, the dream began to form.  I met last Sunday with the lady that lives across the street from mom and dad.  She has had MS for, I think she said, over 15 years and her’s is not the recurring/remitting kind like mine.  She just continually gets worse.  She used to be on the board of the local MS Society and is very knowledgeable about what kind of assistance is out there for us.  I told her about my problem with keeping myself supplied with clay on a consistent basis.  She gave me a whole “to do” list of places to call and get applications from.

While I was waiting for the clay companies and the apps, I went to my doctor for a check up and told her about all of this and she gave me a signed statement to use stating that is was a part of my routine for therapeutic reasons.  After I left there, I started thinking, if I am getting this much benefit from this activity, wouldn’t other MS patients get similar results?  That started a bonfire of activity in my brain.  I got back on my Yahoo and sent out a couple more e-mails to the manufacturers.  One of them contacted me back within the same day asking for a more definitive calculation of my needs.  I shot one back to them and I’m waiting on their reply.  Here is what I laid out for them:

My ultimate goal is to get working with clay to be a recognized physical/neurological/emotional therapy and fully support it.  I need just one manufacturer to commit to being our corporate sponsor and supplying us with X amount of clay per year to use in workshops for MS patients.  Then I will go to the equipment manufacturers and get one of them to agree in supplying X amount of equipment per year.  We in return will publicly advertise their support of our program.  Twice a year we will hold a big wing ding of an auction, televised and all that jazz, to sell the things that are made by said MS patients with the proceeds going back into the MS Foundation/Society for their funding of research for a cure.

Say a prayer that this supplier with come up with an agreement for me!!!  The e-mail from them sounded very promising indeed 🙂  That’s my dream and the reason behind my poem today.

Love to you all!!

Peace and blessings, Terri

 

A Few Wise Words For Your Day & Update on Dad and Mark

Well, dad seems to be doing great since the surgery!  He didn’t even take a pain pill yesterday mom said; he also walked straighter and was more alert that what he had been lately.  thank you God!!

Mark sees his surgeon, same one as dad, tomorrow and will be released to go back to work with restrictions for a couple of weeks.  He went last week to the hip doctor to see about the pain in there but he said it wasn’t the joint, so it must be nerve damage is my guess.  Don’t know that there’s anymore that can be done about that.

And I forgot to tell you about all of these new critters and such.  A few weeks ago on Etsy, I made an $80 sale, woo-hoo!!!  That gave me some supplies money.  I got a few ring blanks and findings but mostly got clay.  Isn’t that great?!  I about dropped my teeth when I saw the email telling me that I’d made a sale.

The following is from a web page that my cousin posted off of on Facebook called: “Lessons Learned in Life” and I thought I would share some of them with you.

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I Pray For Angels

 

 

 

 

 

I was getting a good start on blogging again when all hell broke lose once more!!  

 

The new neurologist wants to run: a 24 hour brain scan; a new MRI; hearing and vision tests on me.  

 

Mark had emergency back surgery 2 1/2 weeks ago and is looking at permanent nerve damage there in his left lower half of his body.  

 

Dad has had one thing after another: the infection in his left testicle is finally getting better but the MRI that they did on his spine last week has now showed, not only the compression of a disc (which they saw in the CAT scan) but also signs of bone cancer.  They are ordering more tests to confirm whether or not it is.  Beings that 8 out of 9 kids in his family had some form of cancer, the odds are not in his favor.  With that being said, he has out lived all of his brothers by about 20+ yrs., so I guess God has blessed us with having his presence in our lives this long.

 

I am not giving up hope and, of course, ask for your prayers.  I do know this much, if it is cancer, I would rather let him go now than see him suffer any more pain.  He has been through enough of that.  Thank you in advance for your prayers and support!!  May God’s will be done, Amen and Amen.

 

Much love to you all, 

Terri

And The Hits Just Keep Coming!

Well, the title says it all!  First off, let me just say again that I appreciate all of the wonderful comments that you have left me since the last time that I posted.  Your kind words, thoughts, prayers and encouragement mean the world to me and I wouldn’t know what to do without them!!!

On Thanksgiving day, right as we were getting ready to leave to go to mom and dad’s to meet Shawna and the kids so that we could follow them and my parents to my sister’s house, the phone rang.  It was my mom calling to tell me that they had just gotten home from the emergency room.

Dad had gone out to get the newspaper out of the driveway and fell.  He broke his other collarbone this time (and his ribs, we think, even though they said the x-ray didn’t show that they were).  He is in a lot of pain.  Mom said she almost called 911 last night because he was practically screaming from the pain.  They went to his doctor’s office and saw the nurse practitioner and she gave him stronger pain meds and dressed his arm that he had skinned up so bad that it peeled his skin all the way off and now they are afraid it may get infected.

Then I get a crying phone call this afternoon from Penny, I asked what was wrong and she says, “I’m in the hospital”.

Come to find out, Sat or Sun, can’t remember which one she said, she was leaving her son’s house and tripped on the sidewalk outside.  She did what we are always afraid dad’s gonna do, she broke her hip!  Through to sobs and gulping for air, she said that it hurt so bad that she didn’t know what to do but cry.  They took her catheter out today and they’re making her get up and walk to the bathroom!!!!  I know they want to keep that hip from freezing up on her but come on!  She said she cries all of the way there and back ’cause it is excruciating.

God bless them both!!  I feel so bad about it and am helpless to do anything for them.

I’ve had almost 70 visitors to the store but haven’t sold anything yet.  😦  It’s discouraging but I’m being as patient as I can be.  I know that I’m not overpricing things.  Compared to what others are charging on their stuff, I’m way under-priced but I want to start getting customers before profits.  I’m just looking at the positive side of it, at least people are looking at what I have on there!

I am working on some more stuff and I have sent for some books, supplies/tools and DVD tutorials about working with clay to that I can start making my own kaleidoscope canes and such.  I really like working with this type of medium and it’s good for my hands.  I get up all stiff and sore but after I’ve worked with the clay for a while, they loosen up and feel better.  Good therapy I guess.  🙂

I will leave you today with a few quotes to bless and encourage you.

I miss you all very much!

Love, mega hugs and abundant blessings,

Terri

 

Bible Quote for today
“Do not add to what I command you and do not subtract from it, but keep the commands of the Lord your God that I give you.”
Deuteronomy 4:2
Love Quotes
“Love takes up where knowledge leaves off.”
Thomas Aquinas
Inspirational Quote of the day
“My motto is: Contented with little, yet wishing for more.” Charles Lamb

The Good, Bad and Not Too Ugly

Hello my dear friends.   There’s good news, not so good news and hopeful news.  So let us get the bad stuff out of the way first.  I went to see Penny last night.  Morale was low but I brought a couple of smiles to her face while I was there, even Sara got one or two herself.

My poor friend is right back where she was when she came home from the hospital after the sepsis; wound vacuum, on oxygen and dealing with physical therapy.  The new kicker is, after the plastic surgery to repair that calf muscle that they had to cut into last time, there is a huge knot there and she says it hurts like a boil.  I try my best to keep reminding her that it could be worse and she could have lost that foot/leg last year when it was such a close call.  She said that she tries to keep it all in perspective but still gets down about starting over when she was so close to completely healed.   I took her a jigsaw puzzle to work on, she gets so bored with not being able to drive.

Dad is doing much, much better!  He has no sling and is driving without any problems.  It seems that his mental awareness is back to normal, as much as can be expected for his age.  So that is great news.

I have almost got the Etsy shop ready to open.  My goal was for last Sunday, but digital imaging problems occurred and I missed that deadline.  Now I just want to be open before Thanksgiving.  I think maybe this Sunday.  Here are a few more things I have been working on in the between time;

I changed the name of our shop WhatsUpDesigns to BlessedMSGallery, I may change it again before I open.  Every thing that I think of comes up already  used.  What do you think of the new name?

That’s it for now, I have to go take some more pictures, but I’ll leave you with this:

 

Love, hugs and blessings to you all!!!