I stepped back away from her outstretched hand. The voice in my head had struck a nervous chord with me. “Don’t touch me please,” I said even though every fiber of my being wanted to step forward to receive it. I want, no, I craved her touch. My greatest desire at this moment was to be caressed, soothed, something – anything that would make me feel loved and wanted.
“Why not?” she somewhat snapped the word off with a bite. I heard the meeting of her teeth together like the nipping of a dog. It was done with such force that I jumped a little at the sound.
“Oh, no offense intended! I just get like that sometimes,” came my weak reply though I doubt that it was very convincing. I’m not a good liar to begin with and, secondly, I was sure that she knew the reality was quite the contrary.
There was something else that was beginning to unsettle me too and that was, as she had begun her approach, she seemed to become shrouded in shadow except for her eyes. They were lit up and actually appeared to be glowing a neon green color, which only served to make the whole situation that much more eery.
Also a steadily increasing rage seemed to emanate from her. I was totally confused with this new persona that I was encountering. Before this she had always seemed to be spiritual, holy, angelic almost and now she was frightening. The voice in my head was speaking again, “She wants to feed on your hatred, forgive your step-mother. It’s the only way to keep yourself safe!”
It was hard enough to fight the urge to succumb to the girl but forgive my step-mother after everything that she had said about me and done to me, never! She had made my life a living hell for the last 3 years and tried to get me put away on the “funny farm” more than once, how could I forgive her for all that? I’d rather rot in hell first.
Teresa Marie 11/13/11